Why You Need A Friend Date And How To Plan One.

Friends….how many of us have them…Friends the ones you can depend on…Friends. Those are Lyrics from the song Friends by the rap group Whodini. The song goes on to discuss the perils of people we call friends but end up being enemies. Oh …but when you want to discuss true friendship the song that comes to mine is the classic Count On Me by Whitney Houston and CECE Winans.

Friendships are the magic that makes life sweet. There was a study reported by Insider that states that people with strong social ties live longer. They have a 50% chance of making it through the hard parts of life. And they don’t mean your significant other or mom. They are taking about the girls your ratchet, bougie , needy, and aggie with. The girl thats going to go with you to target for no reason and browse every isle. That friend.

Some of the most monumental things in my life have happened in the presence of my friends. I’ve learned so many lessons, cried so many tears, celebrated joys, and indulged in strengths and endured flaws and came out on the other other side grateful for the people God put in my life. Most have been seasonal. They have guided me through seasons of brokenness, triumph, hopelessness, and love. Some have been long suffering and have seen me through each of these seasons. Most importantly they have brought a level of joy and love into my life that I could not get from any other source.

As we get older and life gets busier it gets harder and harder to stay connected to friends. We have to be intentional about reconnecting. I like to do that with friend dates and for those who live to far to meet in person phone dates are our thing.

Here are five ways to make our friend dates successful…..

Be flexible with your time and location. Schedules change, things come up and sometimes your girl may be tired. Try to pick a day, time and location that is convenient for the both of you.

Be creative with the activity. Dinner and drinks are cool and may be the your go to thing. Its and effortless after work situation. However expand your thinking. A paint and Sip class, Hit the Gym, Catch a Movie, in warm weather a picnic may be just the break you need. Checking out new spots in your city or out door festivals are also ways to break up the mundane. If your kids are involved coffee and play dates are always a way to catch up. Always keep an open mind.

Put in on the calendar. Make your friend date a non-negotiable. Put in on the calendar as a re-occurring event. Based on your schedules and lifestyles friend dates can be weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly. There should not be a month that goes by that you have not gotten to see your friend face to face.

Take it online.I know that many of my friends live to far away for us to meet so often. So taking our dates virtual are must. We schedule duo calls. One of my favorite calls was her sharing the Texas sunset with me as she sat in her back yard during our call. These sessions are always fun. We usually grab a glass of wine and snuggle in for an hour or so of chats. There are so many cool things you can do online. Cooking together, watching your favorite shows are also pretty cool. There are so many ways to connect.

Go old School. There is something to be said for the old folks who meet at the dinner every morning for there cup of coffee. Or the barbershop to get the weekly news. How about the 90″s mom’s who meet around the kitchen table or at the kitchen island. The meets were always impromptu and frequent. Grab your sweat pants, your Starbucks mug and head over to your bestie for a cup or a glass of whatever floats ya’lls boat. If you want to kick it up a notch make it into a brunch on the patio.

Stick to what you know. If you and your crew have been hitting up happy hour every thirsty Thursday and the chills on McGreger Ave for the last three years and it works….don’t change a thing. Trying to get 2 people to find the time to catch up is difficult. If you and 5 other women have mastered this why change it.

How do you and your friends keep in touch? Are you in need of some quality time with your bestie? Share how what you planned for your friend date over on the gram. #UQsummer